There are many things I give God thanks for. He has truly been instrumental in my life even when I was not walking with Him, but recently my husband and I came under such a great attack until we both thought it was really over this time. I say 'this time' because our marriage has been one of really high ups and massive low downs, but we always have been able to hang in there, but this time seemed like the end....
Last Friday evening, 1/2, my husband and I decided to get away and spend some much needed time with each other. It was great to be able to have that time with him and to just enjoy each other's company. We came back Saturday morning and everything was great, I went to our organizations meeting that afternoon because our meetings are on the first Saturday, and I was telling the ladies that even though we had fun that night, the enemy was in my head reminding me of the last time we got away, which was almost two years ago and we had a huge argument which ended in us coming home early, but I prayed and pushed that thought behind me, choosing not to reflect on the past. That evening was relaxing and we were around the house just talking and laughing. It felt wonderful. Around 9pm that night, I made a note on my Facebook page with this very picture above talking about how we are simply in love with one another and I loved where we were at in our marriage. By 9:45, all hell had broken loose between my husband and our son who was home from college. Words cannot describe the scene that ended up in the street of our house and the police being called. I left to go walking to calm my head before the police got here because who wants to see their family in the street fighting and carrying on. I was crying, mad, but I was praying for guidance on what to do as well and for my husband and son. Two people that are very close to me ended up finding me and spending some time with me to get my head together. One of them ended up bringing me home around 1am. My son was gone and the tension in the house could be cut with a knife.
The next morning, an agrument broke out between him and I that was like no argument before. We ended up not going to church and he was in one part of the house and I in the other. Sunday and Monday I was in a place of feeling lost and not wanting to go on in my marriage because I honestly felt that enough was enough and we could not get past what was done or said in our argument.
Tuesday morning, when my husband got in from his job around 4:30 am, I was awoke because I usually do not sleep anyway, but he took his ring off and handed it to me saying he was done. Oddly enough, I was happy he gave it to me. I felt that was the sign that it was truly over. He went to go to sleep in the bedroom and I was in the den on the sofa. I did not cry or anything because I felt the same way he did. Later that morning, I reached out to a friend of mine asking her would she rent me a room beginning next month. She said she would help me in any way I needed.
Around 3:30pm, after I had taken my son to work and came back in the house, my husband told me he had called our Pastor and she wanted me to call her. Initially, I was puffed up and said I was not calling her with this foolishness because it was over, but after he said it a few times, I did not want to be disobedient, so about fifteen minutes later, I called and she talked, went over scripture, and prayed with me for over an hour. She did not take sides, but gave me the Word of God and I could feel my self calming down. She ended up getting both of us on 3-way and just ministering the Word to us. She told us that neither one of us had grounds for divorce and he needed to get his ring back. That call changed the course of our marriage. I am not going to say that it was automatic because even when he asked for his ring back, in my mind I was like I should not give it back because I did not take it from him, but I gave it back. Before I left to go to class that evening, we talked. My husband humbled himself not to me, but to God. He was talking like I had never heard him talk before with the sincerety of giving our relationship and himself to God fully. It made me look at him differently. I wanted to go forward with the Lord leading and guiding our marriage and I also fully gave it to Him.
I am not posting this to put people all in our business, but I know our marriage is not the only marriage that is under attack. The enemy hates marriage and will always try to come after it, but it is up to us trusting God to lead us to not give in and never give up. Now I am not a proponet of staying in a physically abusive situation or adultry, but if none of that is happening, hold on to God and trust Him to guide you as an individual and your marriage as a couple-as one.
I thank God for my Pastor and her guidance and patience with us. I thank God for my husband because I know he loves me as I do him. Sometimes we go through so much in a relationship until the little simpliest of things seems like a mountian because previous issues were not addressed. I thank God for moving in our lives because honestly it seems like nothing happened. We gave our testimony in church yesterday in hopes of helping couples and I am doing this blog in the same hopes. All I can say is But God for how He is moving upon our hearts and in our marriage........remember to live life now, love life now and trust God in everything because He really is concerned about the things we are concerned about. God Bless!